Monday, September 22, 2008

The NFC West

You know what's awesome? Having your team play in the NFC West. Seriously. You should try it. 0-2 start you say? 1-6 on the Wide Receiver depth chart out with injuries you say? Don't worry, you play the St. Louis Rams.

But seriously, thank you Redskins. Beating Arizona for us was clutch. Maybe if we meet in the playoffs again we won't beat you this time. Well, no, sorry, we'll still beat you. That is, if Matt Hasselbeck has a professional wide receiver to throw to. I think he will. In fact, I think he will by week 5. We should have Branch and Engram back by the time we play Arizona, Boldin should be injured by then, and we'll be fine. Because we play in the NFC West. And it's awesome.

So, regardless of what I titled this post, it's really just a random football ramble. These are my thoughts on the NFL after Week 3. Well, the Jets and Chargers play tonight, but seriously, who cares.

The Bills. They're good. They're the best team in the AFC East. They will win the AFC East, because Miami and NYJ still suck, and, despite what a lot of people who hate good teams say, Tom Brady actually is a very good quarterback, and replacing him with just anybody doesn't mean that O-line, that system, Bill Belichick, and Randy Moss can still mow people down.

Eli Manning. He's good??? I guess so. I mean, I thought there was a chance that winning the Super Bowl meant he'd turned a corner, but it was kind of fluky. And he hasn't looked fantastic. But I've seen a couple plays (down field to Toomer in OT with a gorgeous bomb) where he actually looks like THE Manning.

Speaking of THE Manning... Indy sucks. Oh, and Jacksonville doesn't look very good either. Who's going to win that division? Who cares? Once Tennessee gets in the mix, I stop paying attention.

You know what? The AFC sucks this year. At least so far. I know a lot can change, but really. The only bright spots I think are the Broncos, who I'm calling for the Super Bowl, and the Bills. Every other team is just disappointment. When the Chargers lost in Week 1, I heard people say that it was a surprise because they were a favorite for the Super Bowl. They were? Why? Their defense is good (or should be). Their QB is Phillip fucking douche bag Rivers, their coach is Norv "I'm actually an offensive coordinator pretending to be a head coach" Turner, and LT can only do so much. I mean, really, he can do SOOOOO MUCH, but that's not enough to beat a good Broncos team. Hell, aparently it's not enough to beat a bad Carolina team. AT HOME.

But you know what else? The NFC is pretty fucking awesome. As much as I hate to admit it, the Cowboys are good. Luckily, they play in the polar opposite of the NFC West, the NFC EAST. Holy crap that division is awesome and always has been. The Eagles look sick. The Giants look back and forth, but pretty damn good. The Cowboys will win the division and then Romo will make a bonehead play to lose in the playoffs. Seriously, I think Romo's career is going to be shadowed like this the entire way. He's going to be very good, but make boneheaded, dimple-faced, good ol' boy grinnin' mistakes when they really matter and he'll just never be awesome. In last week's game against the Eagles, when he fumbled in the end zone, recovered, turned to see 3 green monsters swarming on him, why didn't he just hurl the ball away? Can it be grounding if there's been a fumble? Anyway, Romo is like the best quarterback that sucks. I hate Romo.

The St. Louis Rams, the Kansas City Chiefs, the Detroit Lions. These teams are very bad. Like abysmal. When you've got Julius Jones and TJ Duckett combining for over 200 yds rushing, combined with a passing attack that consists of a guy named Courtney and another named Bumpus scoring on you, you are a terrible, awful, unbelievably bad football team. Thank you St. Louis Rams.

I hate watching games involving the Chicago Bears and the Baltimore Ravens. I mean, if you can assemble an entire defense as good as they have, why can't you assemble... a quarterback. What's hilarious is that Baltimore actually tries to. They love drafting them some qb's.

I miss Wide Receivers. Seriously. Last week, before the game, I was excited that we were going to have Seneca Wallace as a starting WR, because he's awesome. Our backup QB is 5th on our WR depth chart. That's cool. What's not cool is having to have your 5th WR start as your #1. Well, having to, but not being able to because HE TOO GETS INJURED. 1-6. Unbelievable. Has this ever happened before? Deion Branch, Bobby Engram, Nate Burleson (IR), Ben Obomanu (IR), Seneca Wallace, Logan Payne (IR). What? 3 on IR too! What the hell. We RE-SIGNED Koren Robinson for christ's sake! We actually traded a DRAFT PICK for Keary Colbert. We played Courtney Taylor, Michael Bumpus, and Billy McMullen???? Who are these guys? They sound like characters in a Dukes of Hazzard rip off.

Feels good to get that off my chest. Well I'm kind of done rambling. Wilson, congrats to your Bills, they look great. As do the Eagles. My Seahawks are in shambles, and I'm still fairly confident we'll make the playoffs. Teams from Ohio are awful.

I'm stoked about the season, even though I should be terrified. But my Seahawks play in the NFC West, so everything is going to be alright.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

The King is Dead, Long Live the King

A post is coming on the forthcoming ascendancy of the Bills and the end of the Belichick reign of terror. I'm just so delirious with happiness that I can't really string together words complete sentences in. Post tomorrow maybe I will write.